I want a faith that bleeds
that opens up and scars
I want a faith that chokes
that coughs and struggles for air
I want a faith that bruises
that swells and hurts to touch
I want a faith that's abused
I want a faith that takes a beating
I want a faith that is tangible and real
I want a faith that's used and broken but never dies and never quits
I want a faith that will collapse to it's knees with fatigue and pain just to slowly stand back up to its feet, look it's challenger in the face and say in a Kris Kristofferson tone... "Is that the best you can do?"
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
All Points Bulletin!!!
CALLING ALL CARS! CALLING ALL CARS! WE HAVE AN APB FOR A CAUCASIAN MALE, WHITE HAIR, LONG WHITE BEARD, WEARING A WHITE ROBE AND SANDALS. RESPONDS TO THE NAME FATHER, ABBA OR GOD.
To many people (especially White America) this can be a picture perfect explanation of who they know God to be.
I recently started reading The Shack; this exact issue has been the cause of controversy among some Christians and confusion among some non-Christians. In the novel, God presents himself to the protagonist Mack as a large black woman named Elousia or as Mack uncomfortably refers to her, "Papa". Some Christians have a very hard time with this interpretation because they know God only as they have known him for most of their lives; a larger than life, grandpa/wizard figure with the power to judge and to create.
At the same time, some non-Christians are being led in strange directions taking this story for 100% fact and gaining an in-correct view that God is what you want it to be, and that's based on what you want to perceive God as and God could in fact be a female.
I want to preface the rest of this writing with this...I fully believe that scripture is correct and God is in our best understanding of the word, a man. This is not a misogynistic view I developed in childhood, this is me supporting scripture that from the very start refers to God as "He". However, I don't disagree with the author portraying God as a large black woman who loves to bake and talk.
I believe that as followers of Christ, we need to be careful not to lead someone who doesn't know Jesus down an odd and confusing path of an ambiguous God. I feel that certain people should refrain or be very careful before reading a book like this because I think that anyone Christian or non could take this text and look into it a number of different ways. I also, however, feel that as followers of Christ, we can't limit God or put him in a box.
In the story, God presents himself as a large black woman to a man who had an abusive father growing up. Macks character struggles with the idea of a father being loving or supportive. His dad was an alcoholic and an abuser and his only experience with a Dad figure is negative. God presents himself to Mack as a large black woman to help Mack let down his guard; to enter into a relationship with him on a level that Mack can deal with and open up to.
When God appeared to Moses as a burning bush, do we as Christians jump to offense to say, "God is not a bush!"? No. We know that God is not foliage. God chose to present himself to Moses in a way that would get his attention and break through to reach Moses and demonstrate his power. I feel that God has presented himself to me through financial stress. This doesn't mean that God is a financial burden, it means that through this stress, God reveals himself to me. God continually breaks down the walls that we build to keep him out. He penetrates through the garbage that surrounds our hearts and our lives that keeps us from him. For me, I was having more faith in financial security than God. He needed to break me down and through financial stress, I've been reminded of his love and his faithfulness to me.
When God became flesh and came to earth as Jesus Christ he did so not just to act as the ultimate sacrifice for sin, he did so not just to fulfill the law, but he did so to meet people in their situation where they were at. He could have come to the earth as anything but he did so as a man to relate to people and to be tangible and real. He became a real figure that common people could understand and be with.
In a sense, God could be your neighbor. I'm not implying that your neighbor is God, but what I mean is God could be anyone you encounter. Matthew 25:40 says...
To many people (especially White America) this can be a picture perfect explanation of who they know God to be.
I recently started reading The Shack; this exact issue has been the cause of controversy among some Christians and confusion among some non-Christians. In the novel, God presents himself to the protagonist Mack as a large black woman named Elousia or as Mack uncomfortably refers to her, "Papa". Some Christians have a very hard time with this interpretation because they know God only as they have known him for most of their lives; a larger than life, grandpa/wizard figure with the power to judge and to create.
At the same time, some non-Christians are being led in strange directions taking this story for 100% fact and gaining an in-correct view that God is what you want it to be, and that's based on what you want to perceive God as and God could in fact be a female.
I want to preface the rest of this writing with this...I fully believe that scripture is correct and God is in our best understanding of the word, a man. This is not a misogynistic view I developed in childhood, this is me supporting scripture that from the very start refers to God as "He". However, I don't disagree with the author portraying God as a large black woman who loves to bake and talk.
I believe that as followers of Christ, we need to be careful not to lead someone who doesn't know Jesus down an odd and confusing path of an ambiguous God. I feel that certain people should refrain or be very careful before reading a book like this because I think that anyone Christian or non could take this text and look into it a number of different ways. I also, however, feel that as followers of Christ, we can't limit God or put him in a box.
In the story, God presents himself as a large black woman to a man who had an abusive father growing up. Macks character struggles with the idea of a father being loving or supportive. His dad was an alcoholic and an abuser and his only experience with a Dad figure is negative. God presents himself to Mack as a large black woman to help Mack let down his guard; to enter into a relationship with him on a level that Mack can deal with and open up to.
When God appeared to Moses as a burning bush, do we as Christians jump to offense to say, "God is not a bush!"? No. We know that God is not foliage. God chose to present himself to Moses in a way that would get his attention and break through to reach Moses and demonstrate his power. I feel that God has presented himself to me through financial stress. This doesn't mean that God is a financial burden, it means that through this stress, God reveals himself to me. God continually breaks down the walls that we build to keep him out. He penetrates through the garbage that surrounds our hearts and our lives that keeps us from him. For me, I was having more faith in financial security than God. He needed to break me down and through financial stress, I've been reminded of his love and his faithfulness to me.
When God became flesh and came to earth as Jesus Christ he did so not just to act as the ultimate sacrifice for sin, he did so not just to fulfill the law, but he did so to meet people in their situation where they were at. He could have come to the earth as anything but he did so as a man to relate to people and to be tangible and real. He became a real figure that common people could understand and be with.
In a sense, God could be your neighbor. I'm not implying that your neighbor is God, but what I mean is God could be anyone you encounter. Matthew 25:40 says...
"Jesus will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
God could be the widow whose lawn you mowed, God could be the Latino guy down the street who you helped tow his car. God could be the orphaned child whom you paid to get immunizations.
God cannot be limited nor can we expect to harness even a fraction of what he is capable of or what he does daily to dip into our lives and give us an opportunity to trust him, to love him, and to serve him.
I have yet to finish The Shack so I can't give my full and honest opinion yet. However, I can say that recently God as presented himself to me as a novel; a fictional story that has reminded me that his love for us is beyond measure and understanding and his desire for a relationship with us is truly what our faith in him is all about. No gimmicks, no super religious law, just an honest to goodness reciprocated relationship from a parent to a child.
God cannot be limited nor can we expect to harness even a fraction of what he is capable of or what he does daily to dip into our lives and give us an opportunity to trust him, to love him, and to serve him.
I have yet to finish The Shack so I can't give my full and honest opinion yet. However, I can say that recently God as presented himself to me as a novel; a fictional story that has reminded me that his love for us is beyond measure and understanding and his desire for a relationship with us is truly what our faith in him is all about. No gimmicks, no super religious law, just an honest to goodness reciprocated relationship from a parent to a child.
Friday, April 2, 2010
Hope For All
I commonly post blogs either during or after reading a really good book. This blog is no different.
I just finished the book "Red Letters: Living a Faith That Bleeds" by Tom Davis and although it wasn't exactly what I expected, it was a really great read.
In the book, Tom challenges readers to live out the "red letters" in the New Testament. The red letters are the words Jesus spoke that have been hi-lighted in red throughout the 4 gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) His point is to take Jesus seriously and literally when it comes to a call to care for others; He wants to see people get socially active as Jesus instructs. Tom's main point of focus in the book was Africa.
Africa is a continent of lush terrain, beautiful deserts and amazing wildlife. Africa is rich in culture and history, however, Africa is at risk of losing everything. Due to the HIV/AIDS epidemic (which has actually been labeled as a Pandemic; an even larger and more severe problem than an epidemic) Africa is losing a war to an enemy we can help fight. Not only are we called to help as people, but as Christians, followers of Christ, we should be even more eager and more willing to help as we have been instructed by our King.
Matthew 25:35-40: "Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
Jesus tells us in this passage that he is the poor and the needy. When we serve our fellow man, we serve Jesus. Many of us would quickly drop whatever we are doing for an opportunity to physically serve Jesus (wash his feet, give him a drink, etc.) but it can be difficult to find the motivation to do something for someone we feel we don't know that lives half way across the globe.
I don't think that we are called to sell everything we own and give all our money to those in need, but I do feel that we have the ability to do something. Lots of people give and lots of people help in different ways. Not all of us are called to give to the situation in Africa, not all of us are called to physically serve over seas. But we are called as Christians to take care of those and fight for those who don't have the ability to fight for themselves.
This fight doesn't have to involve packing up and flying to Africa tonight (but as Tom Davis said, if that's what God calls you to then go for it!) It doesn't even have to mean a financial donation; it could simply mean starting with prayer. It might mean that next time you go to buy an iPod or Starbucks gift card, you purchase a (RED) sponsored product which sends a portion of the money spent towards HIV/AIDS relief. The main point here is not to do something outside your capability, but to simply do something. It's time to get off the sidelines and play.
I know salvation is not based on works or actions, but in the end, I still don't want to have to account for the loss of human life because I was selfish or greedy with my time and money.
This blog isn't intended to be some "Peace and Love, save the planet" type of soap box declaration. But I just wanted to take some time to share where I'm at what I've been reading. Ultimately it's got to be a decision from within to get active and help in some way. I'm currently not even sure in what manner my family or myself will get involved; I'm currently waiting and praying to see what that looks like, but, if you decide you have some interest and want to look into what can be done, I've listed some sites where you can start to get active.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
A Call To Arms
we
we are
we are in the golden age of deceit
we are the future... we are the past and we are the present
we are the here and now
we are the children born into a generation driven by lust, greed and hatered
we are the sons and daughters of "i want it now"ism and instant gratification
we are guiltless, shamelss, tired and blameless
however...
we are not alone
we are in this together
we are the hands that can tear down this black city
we are the foundation on which the new kingdom will be built
we are the children of rescue, salvage and truth
we are the dawn of a new day
we can stand and fight; we are stronger
we are patiently waiting, loving not hating
we are the revolution
we are...I am...
you
we are
we are in the golden age of deceit
we are the future... we are the past and we are the present
we are the here and now
we are the children born into a generation driven by lust, greed and hatered
we are the sons and daughters of "i want it now"ism and instant gratification
we are guiltless, shamelss, tired and blameless
however...
we are not alone
we are in this together
we are the hands that can tear down this black city
we are the foundation on which the new kingdom will be built
we are the children of rescue, salvage and truth
we are the dawn of a new day
we can stand and fight; we are stronger
we are patiently waiting, loving not hating
we are the revolution
we are...I am...
you
Friday, July 31, 2009
Where I'm At...
After probably over a year of really pursuing law enforcement and even longer than that wanting to be a part of law enforcement, I've come to a place where I'm not really sure if that's where God wants me.
I've wanted to be a police officer partly for the experience (it always seemed fascinating), partly for the pay (not having a college degree it seems like a decent way to make over $40k a year), partly for the freedom (working three 12's and having between 3 to 4 days off a week seems awesome), and also to accomplish my goals (Tonya staying home, buying a house, etc)
But the more I listen to God and the more I really think about my motives. I feel like they might be really selfish. I'm not saying that I will never pursue law enforcement or that I am never going to be called to that area. But I feel like God doesn't want me there right now.
I realized that if I get into a career that pays me $50k a year, allows me to buy a home and keep Tonya from working, that I will at that point no longer be listening to what God wants for my life. I will be in the job that I will have deemed as my final place. The job I will stay and retire from. If in the middle of all that God called me to plant a church or give up the job and pursue ministry, I can honestly say it would be a slim chance that I would want to give all that up to follow his will.
I'm starting to feel that maybe the reason I'm in a job that I'm not sure where I'm headed or the reason that I have spent the majority of my adult life wondering "where do I fit in" is because God has not placed me where I need to be yet. He has me in a position that is extremely easy to give up so that I will not only be constantly listening for where he wants to put me, but be ready when the time comes to make the move to where I need to be.
I don't know where I am going to be next month and maybe God does want me in Boulder County, but for now, I feel like he is telling me to wait on him, teaching me to be faithful even when income is down and showing me that I can be more satisfied serving him than serving my worldly desires and goals.
A true man is not someone who can provide for his family 100% all the time without testing, or buy them a house, or own the newest vehicle. A true man is someone who can patiently wait on the Lord and be ready to act at a moments notice when he is called.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
As time goes by...
Blake just celebrated his first birthday and I can't believe a year has gone by so quickly. My parents used to always tell me that the older I got, the faster time went by. I didn't believe them as you never truly believe anything your parents say no matter how wise and or relevant it may seem. But it's true. I've been married for over 2 years, work full time and now have a 1 year old son and I have to sit and wonder...where did the time go?
It sounds so cliche, but it literally seems like just yesterday my voice was changing and I was getting my first hair on my chin. Now here I stand with a wife, a son and bills up to my eyes. I'm gaining weight and losing hair and can't help but think how quickly my mid-to-late twenties are going to pass by.
Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade what I have for the world. I love my Tonya and Blake and am so happy to have started my family. But if I could do it over again, there are some things I would change.
College never seemed like the right thing for me, and sometimes I still don't think it is. However, the lack of a degree doesn't seem to bother me as much as the lack of completion. Granted I probably won't make as much money as someone who has a bachelors degree and I'm guaranteed to not be qualified for 50% or more of the jobs out there (this idea still somewhat haunts me), but I still think what bothers me most is that I didn't have the motivation or determination to get out there and finish school. My generation seems to be on the line between seeing a need for college and seeing a need for freedom. I am one of those people still stuck with 2 major life choices crushing in on either side of me. Regardless, if I could go back and do it again...a 4 year degree would have been my choice.
If I could go back to sophomore year of high school and sit back down in the weight room where I began to workout at 15 years old. I would have pushed myself to stick with it; to not give up and not quit; to make a choice then, that would benefit me years down the road for the sake of feeling better and for the longevity of life with my family.
There are so many things that I look back on and think, "Why couldn't I have enjoyed that more?" or "Why did I have to make that decision?". But when it's all said and done, there's nothing that can be done to change the past. All I can do is look forward. Time will fly by no matter what, poor choices will be made constantly, but through it all I'm still here living my life now with the people I love.
God has blessed me with a family who loves me. Some I have known all my life, some I have inherited through marriage and 1 in particular I helped to create. Time goes by so quickly and there seems to be so many things I wish I could do over, but if all I do is spend time wishing I could have back the time that has flown by, I will miss out on the time I have ahead.
My life may not be perfect, and my early thirties will be here before I know it but I'm so happy to know that I will be sharing this time with the ones I love and taking advantage of every moment possible so ten years from now when I am thirty four I can look back and say.."Not bad Chris...not bad at all."
It sounds so cliche, but it literally seems like just yesterday my voice was changing and I was getting my first hair on my chin. Now here I stand with a wife, a son and bills up to my eyes. I'm gaining weight and losing hair and can't help but think how quickly my mid-to-late twenties are going to pass by.
Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade what I have for the world. I love my Tonya and Blake and am so happy to have started my family. But if I could do it over again, there are some things I would change.
College never seemed like the right thing for me, and sometimes I still don't think it is. However, the lack of a degree doesn't seem to bother me as much as the lack of completion. Granted I probably won't make as much money as someone who has a bachelors degree and I'm guaranteed to not be qualified for 50% or more of the jobs out there (this idea still somewhat haunts me), but I still think what bothers me most is that I didn't have the motivation or determination to get out there and finish school. My generation seems to be on the line between seeing a need for college and seeing a need for freedom. I am one of those people still stuck with 2 major life choices crushing in on either side of me. Regardless, if I could go back and do it again...a 4 year degree would have been my choice.
If I could go back to sophomore year of high school and sit back down in the weight room where I began to workout at 15 years old. I would have pushed myself to stick with it; to not give up and not quit; to make a choice then, that would benefit me years down the road for the sake of feeling better and for the longevity of life with my family.
There are so many things that I look back on and think, "Why couldn't I have enjoyed that more?" or "Why did I have to make that decision?". But when it's all said and done, there's nothing that can be done to change the past. All I can do is look forward. Time will fly by no matter what, poor choices will be made constantly, but through it all I'm still here living my life now with the people I love.
God has blessed me with a family who loves me. Some I have known all my life, some I have inherited through marriage and 1 in particular I helped to create. Time goes by so quickly and there seems to be so many things I wish I could do over, but if all I do is spend time wishing I could have back the time that has flown by, I will miss out on the time I have ahead.
My life may not be perfect, and my early thirties will be here before I know it but I'm so happy to know that I will be sharing this time with the ones I love and taking advantage of every moment possible so ten years from now when I am thirty four I can look back and say.."Not bad Chris...not bad at all."
Friday, December 19, 2008
Classical Music
As I sit and listen to Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart's "Rondo Alla Turca", I feel inspired and energized. I spent 4 years of my life playing the viola but never cared much for classical music. It always seemed so boring and the songs were WAY too long. However, now, I really do love it.
It's truly amazing to be able to hear music that was composed a few hundred years ago. It's like being in a history class or hopping in a time machine and it's so interesting when you think that you are hearing music that's now considered classical but at one point in time was cutting edge and new to the world. The notes fall on our ears and evoke the same feelings and emotions the way it did for someone fortunate enough to hear live music in the mid 1700's. Classical music tells a story. Whether it was intended to or not, I always feel that I'm listening to an epic tale being told from 1st hand experience. Each note and phrase, every crescendo is soaked with the passion and intensity of the composer; someone who poured his life into his music and was making music for the beauty of music, not for the big bucks and celebrity status.
Music is timeless. Mozart created his music with intention and passion. The classical time period didn't pop out musicians and "pop stars" a dozen a week. You couldn't take a handsome man or a pretty girl and throw them behind a piano and tell them to compose a big hit. Musicians were inspired and gifted beyond understanding.
All this being said, next time you choose (or have no choice) to listen to classical music, don't let it slowly blend into the background noise of the day, but let every note sink into your heart. Allow your self to close your eyes and drift back to a time when music wasn't just something to fill in the silence. Take a step back in time and enjoy the music that has inspired generations for centuries.
It's truly amazing to be able to hear music that was composed a few hundred years ago. It's like being in a history class or hopping in a time machine and it's so interesting when you think that you are hearing music that's now considered classical but at one point in time was cutting edge and new to the world. The notes fall on our ears and evoke the same feelings and emotions the way it did for someone fortunate enough to hear live music in the mid 1700's. Classical music tells a story. Whether it was intended to or not, I always feel that I'm listening to an epic tale being told from 1st hand experience. Each note and phrase, every crescendo is soaked with the passion and intensity of the composer; someone who poured his life into his music and was making music for the beauty of music, not for the big bucks and celebrity status.
Music is timeless. Mozart created his music with intention and passion. The classical time period didn't pop out musicians and "pop stars" a dozen a week. You couldn't take a handsome man or a pretty girl and throw them behind a piano and tell them to compose a big hit. Musicians were inspired and gifted beyond understanding.
All this being said, next time you choose (or have no choice) to listen to classical music, don't let it slowly blend into the background noise of the day, but let every note sink into your heart. Allow your self to close your eyes and drift back to a time when music wasn't just something to fill in the silence. Take a step back in time and enjoy the music that has inspired generations for centuries.
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